Fragglerats.com

It is with a broken heart I say farewell to a beloved friend. Such a handsome boy, so proud.

You made me smile, made me laugh and its with tears I let you go on to the bridge. Wait for me there little man, tell those gone before you how much they are still missed and loved.

I cannot even begin to tell you Fergus how very much I love you. My heart, I know it beats, but I am sure the rythm is one step lighter. My agony is contained only in knowing you no longer suffer, dont feel the pain of a body gone frail with age.

I thought I could do this without tears and they stream down my face baby, mommy couldnt watch you suffer and in that choice I have hurt myself deeply.

I will see you in every rat, look for that wisdm. One last time I will sing to you..to have your handsome little face looking up at me, bruxing happily.

At last
my love has come along
my lonely days over
and life is like a song

Ooh, yeah, yeah
At last
the skies above are blue
My heart was wrapped up in clover
the night I looked at you

I found a dream
that I could speak to
A dream that I
can call my own
I found a thrill
to press my cheek to
A thrill that I have never known
Ohh, yeah, yeah

You smile
you smile
Ooh and then the spell was cast
And here we are in heaven
for you are mine at last

That will always be the song I hum for you Fergie. I love you little man. Sleep well.

Always,
Mommy

Fergus is better or so it would seem. I still struggle with him when taking water, but he is eating on his own. Soft foods he can lap up, he isnt able to chew. The stress has my asthma flared up, but only out of sheer worry for my beloved old man. Time has grown short for both him and his brother, leaves an ache that I cant even explain easily.

I find that even facing their eventual deaths, I am settled in some small way. I look at them and feel such love and honor to be part of thir lives no matter how short. They give so much in the time they are with you. Boggles the mind that people cant seem to understand the bond a rat forms with his/her humans.

I will thank good breeders for these calm, loving and trusting companions. They take the time to play and fuss with babies for weeks. That gives me friendly and happy ratkids that look to me for friendship and comfort. I am often surprised and amused by the lengths a rat will go to get some attention.

The cage will always be in the living room, a big part of my life. I enjoy having the boys right there next to me. I can be sitting on the couch and reach in for a tickle or a nibble. They enjoy a stroll on the couch while I read or peek a boo under the blanket on my lap.

I ramble out of anxiety this evening, the worry that one morning I will wake to find one of my little men gone on to the bridge *sighs*

Love comes in many packages, but none quite as wonderful, quite as curious as the love of a rat for his “mommy”

Spent a while at the vets yesterday evening. I am watching the decline of my Fragglerats and my heart breaks. I cried when the vet told me that Wembley has congestive heart failure, my beloved old man. I watch Fergus spin his hind legs uselessly some mornings and the lump in my throat is almost to much to bear. My original crew is getting to the point that they need more specialized care. Our alpha, tough old Wembles will need two meds twice a day for whatever time he has left. We are in the planning stage for a retirement cage *sigh*. Vroo, already one of the few standing from that batch needs some lumps removed. My babies are having a harder time and I feel helpless.

The younger kids seem careful of the elders and play lightly, tease and then cuddle. I find my heart filled with love at the care and attention even rotten youngsters will lavish on old fellas that cant play anymore. Chubbs spends his days with Fergus and will help him itch his back LOL, its a sight to see. Boo is the cage master when it comes to making sure ears are clean as a whistle. Heccles is the best blanket in the cage.

I am helpless. I knew this day would come, but it seems to get here far to quickly. I have been left with the choice of helping to ease suffering with medication or to allow nature to take its course. Truth is? my heart cannot bear to watch and wait, my selfish side will do whatever I can to keep them comfortable and here just a little longer. That few days, those weeks..they are worth everything and in the end, even the heartbreak and grief will have been worrth it, time well spent.

Grah, my Vroobert has a huge lump under his front leg. He has an appointment on Monday afternoon. He will of course have it removed because I refuse to leave it and have his walking hindered. The Uncles are going as well, for a check up. My boys turned 23 months this past Thursday and I am planning a wonderful cake for June, something fancy and extra special. Two means alot for rats and their day will be special. I have already ordered their gifts, special cage accessories for them.

My cage is quiet most afternoons, they spend the day sleeping. Tiny yawns and barely opened eyes greet me in from work. They will of course rise to the occassion if I have a treat or pick them up. One at a time, so warm and fuzzy, they smell slightly of musk..a bit pissy as boys are want to be. Each a prince, regal in his own way as he is is inspected and lovingly cuddled. Fergus is as limber as a doll, Hector laying on his back as I tickle tiny toes. Wembles in his kingly way grumbles, but is generous in patience as I look for any new lumps or bumps. Boo grins in his wild way, Urn and Fes always plotting a way out of body checks. My pumpkin baby tolerates his checks with indifference and the occassional squeal of protest, how dare a mere human suggest he is less than perfect. Vroo, such an easy boy, so kind and loving. What else is there to do but give himself over lovingly to my searching hands.

I am a humble servant to these little men, always waiting to cater to each whim. They amuse me greatly and often bring me to tears of worry and frustration. I feel useless against the march of time and I can do little but watch them age and grow older.

Its May, hopefully we will see the onset of warm weather all the time. I need to get the cage outside and tear it completely down and scrub the hell out of it! Im sure the boys would enjoy some airing out as wel. We have birthdays coming up in June. Cant wait for that. My Fraggles are getting up there and doing well still.

I have so much to do and pictures to pull off the camera. I finally got the password all set for picassa again. New puter and bigger hard drive left me scrambling to figure out passwords to alot of sites.

Things will be going up and Im thinking this site needs a facelift as well. Its sat this way for far to long. We need some brighter colors. I will talk with Scott and see about having some changes made.